Saturday, February 20, 2010

My deepest darkest feelings...

My "here's what I really think of you" announcement to:

  • the parents of children on the news everyday that are traded for drugs, left to wander 2 blocks in the middle of the night, or left in dumpsters.
  • the parents of children who feel entitled to EVERYTHING, think they're above everyone else, and think the rules don't apply to them.
  • Especially parents who NEVER tell their children NO or stand by while their child is blatantly rude, dishonest, hurtful, or mean and don't do anything.
  • Also, to those parents who are NOT appreciative of the blessing ALL children are, along with the RESPONSIBILITY they have to care for and raise them WELL.

I'm sick of it.

I'm sick of pretending I don't hate your guts for your lack of parentin, and how it is affecting your child/children.

I'm sick of hearing about you on the news, Oprah shows, and on the internet.

I'm sick of the hatred I feel for you EVERY time I see or hear of you neglecting your child who needs you more than your socialization, your job, your drug addiction, or your other children.

  • I hate that you expect others to do for your child what YOU should have been doing all along but haven't.
  • I hate even more, your fury, when the others don't do it "RIGHT".
  • I hate that you think you're the victim.
  • I hate that you think it's everyone else's fault.
  • I hate that I still HAVE to be kind and considerate, and that by voicing my opinion of you, I'M the bad guy.
  • I hate that because I don't have any children, my opinion of any of these types of situations doesn't matter because "I don't know".
  • I hate being in a public setting, seeing you, being annoyed because I feel I should keep an eye out for your child because I know you won't be paying attention.
  • I hate that you judge me because I don't have children and you don't know anything about me, or care to find out.
  • I hate that you tell me how lucky I am because I'm not tied down with children.
  • I hate that I KNOW I could do a better job, but will probably never get the chance.
  • Most of all, I hate myself for my thoughts and feelings towards you. I know being a parent is hard. I know you want what's best for your child, even if YOU cannot provide that (for whatever reason that I don't know and even if I did, I couldn't/wouldn't understand).

Wow... I have some issues! But I feel SO much better after writing that!

*****If this offends you, I'm sorry. I know many of my thought processes are not in the "norm" especially for those of you that read this with children, and even more so if INFERTILITY has NEVER applied to you. A lot of things have happened in my life that is causing me to finally admit my deepest darkest feelings.

*****I'm not calling ANYONE a bad parent. I know parenting is hard, and if I ever get the chance I won't be perfect at it so, I'm sorry if this makes you feel that way.

*****I am voicing my opinions and feelings. You're welcome to disagree, but not to tell me how I feel is wrong.


Anonymous said...

I must not be the norm either because I think and feel the same way you do. I'm glad to see I'm not the only one.
Cheers to that ! :)

Lee Family said...

You are SOO not in the wrong. I wish more people felt like you. Maybe then we wouldn't have so many of the problems that are facing the world and our children today.

As a side note, I know that you will have children one day, even if it's not in the "normal" way. My offer will always be open to you and John if that is what it comes down to. I love you both very much.

deirdre said...

i think you should turn off the news, get to know the people in your community more, teach parenting classes, take some education and psychology classes, volunteer more and love more and stop hating

Jaymee said...

i am right there with you. nothing in this world makes my blood boil faster than people who take their children for granted, and i am not even talking about cases of extreme abuse. just people who cannot appreciate that their children are alive.


Kristin said...

No honey, you're not the bad one. Those asshats who play (and badly at that) at being a parent are the horrid ones. They make my blood boil too. {{{Hugs}}}


Myndi said...

You certainly aren't alone in your feelings. It isn't fair that so many bad parents are able to have children so easily while so many good parents have to give up so much to have even the slightest chance of having what they take for granted. It isn't fair. And you have every right to say so.

Anonymous said...


I think I've had all of these same thoughts and feelings!

Baby On Mind said...

Well said. I've had the same thoughts too!

jenicini said...

Amen! I usually follow this up with, if you didn't want children then you should stop.....! :)

On that note, Happy ICLW! :)

Serendipity said...

I so could have written most of this. Even now that I have my dream, it's still a total slap when I see/hear parents like this. Don't feel bad about feeling this way, you're totally entitled to.


kimbosue said...

I'm not going to tell you to stop hating because this is your little blog space made just for you and your thoughts. I can tell you that I felt exactly the same way before I became a parent and still feel the same way after.


Jenny said...

I feel you on this! I'll never understand why there are people in the world who should never breed do, and those of us who are stable and would be good parents struggle to have a child.

Stefanie said...

Very well said...

~stopping by for ICLW~

Suzy said...

AMEN SISTA. Seriously, I have the same opinions. It's all too much sometimes.

Anonymous said...

Well said. You shouldn't apologize for your thoughts. I know exactly what you mean...sometimes it's so tough to stand by and watch things happen. Sometimes I'm even spiteful of my own parents for being able to have kids because they were such horrible parents. Hang in there!!


Amel said...

I can relate to everything you wrote here. Hope you felt glad after writing all those thoughts 'coz I sure felt glad after I wrote about many things in my IF blog. :-D Happy weekend!